Fans are (somewhat) patiently awaiting the next season of the massively popular HBO series, “Game of Thrones.” As the plot thickens and being heating up, season 3 is promising to be, well, amazing. What is great about the series, besides the overall story, is the large cast with many impressive actors attached, and with each new season we get a plethora of new faces to grow to like before they (most likely) bite the dust. The main cast currently includes Richard Madden, Kit Harington, Emilia Clarke, Michelle Fairley, Sophie Turner, Maisie Williams, Isaac Hempstead-Wright, Alfie Allen, Lena Headey, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, Peter Dinklage, Jack Gleeson, Rory McCann, Aidan Gillen and Iian Glen.
With the premiere of season 3, however, we see an addition of 14 new cast members to the ensemble.
Dame Diana Rigg as Olenna Redwyne, The Queen of Thorns
You might recognize her as the cat-suited secret agent Emma Peel in the British TV series “The Avengers” (a role later taken by Uma Thurman in the disastrous 1998 film version). She also played the only woman James Bond ever loved, killed just after their wedding, in “On Her Majesty’s Secret Service.” Her most recent movie appearance being in 2006’s “The Painted Veil.”
The Character: Olenna Tyrell (née Redwyne), is the grandmother of season two addition Margaery Tyrell, described as a cunning, manipulative matriarch who comes to King’s Landing to oversee her granddaughter’s wedding to King Joffrey.
Clive Russell as Brynden Tully, The Blackfish
The Scottish actor Clive Russell is already relatively well-known since he starred in Neil Gaiman’s TV series “Neverwhere” as villain Mr. Vandemaar and also had a recurring role as sinister comics boss Damien Knox in Edgar Wright’s “Spaced. He’s got over a hundred credits to his name, but the most recognizable one of late is as Captain Tanner in both Guy Ritchie “Sherlock Holmes” films.
The Character: Brynden is the uncle of Catelyn Stark (née Tully), a famous knight who now fights alongside Robb, becoming one of his most trusted advisers and comrades.
Tobias Menzies as Edmure Tully
A RADA grad best known at first for playing Brutus in another HBO epic, “Rome,” before being M’s right-hand man in “Casino Royale.” Most recently, he starred in “The Recruiting Officer” at the Donmar Warehouse in London.
The Character: Catelyn’s younger brother, Edmure, is a whoring, hot-headed figure, but good at heart.**Spoiler** He becomes the lord of Riverrun after his father, Hoster Tully, dies.
Mackenzie Crook as Orell
Crook came to fame as Gareth on the original BBC version of “The Office,” before going on to appear in the original “Pirates of the Caribbean” trilogy. However, he has begun adding more serious roles to his credits, appearing first in “The Seagull” withKristin Scott Thomas, Chiwetel Ejiofor and Carey Mulligan, then the award-winning “Jerusalem,” and most recently “The Recruiting Officer” alongside Menzies.
The Character: Orell is one of the lieutenants of Mance Rayder (the biggest part yet to be cast), the so-called King of the North. He’s a skinchanger, which means he’s able to shift his consciousness inside an animal, in his case an eagle.
Richard Dormer as Beric Dondarrion
The Northern Irish actor starred as troubled snooker player Alex Higgins in stage hit “Hurricane,” which he also wrote. He also appeared in films like “Mrs. Henderson Presents” and “Five Minutes Of Heaven” and TV series like “My Boy Jack” and “Hidden,” but recently got a lead role — later in the year, he’ll star as Belfast punk legend Terri Hooley in “Good Vibrations” from the producers of “24 Hour Party People.”
The Character: Beric Of Dondarrion is a former soldier for Ned Stark, who is now the leader of the outlaw group the Brotherhood Without Banners, and may or may not be unkillable.
Nathalie Emmannuel as Missandei
Emmanuel appeared on the British teen soap “Hollyoaks,” in which she played Sasha Valentine, who became a prostitute and a heroin addict. Since leaving the show in 2010, she’s starred as Nala in “The Lion King” on stage and appeared in the most recent season of cult superhero drama “Misfits.”
The Character: Daenerys is a little lacking in followers after the events in Qarth, but Missandei, an interpreter in the slave city of Astapor, looks to fill the gap. Eleven in the books, clearly a little older here.
Kerry Ingram as Shireen Baratheon
At 13 years old, she has already had her fair share of success, sharing the Olivier Award(the British equivalent of the Tonys) for Best Actress in a Musical for playing the title character in smash-hit musical “Matilda.”
The Character: Shireen Baratheon is the young daughter of Stannis Baratheon (Stephen Dillane), who nearly died of a disease called ‘greyscale’ as a child, and is left with flaky, grey dead skin on her left cheek and neck as a result.
Tara Fitzgerald as Selyse Baratheon
She played Ophelia to Ralph Fiennes’ Hamlet in 1995, winning a Drama Desk Award for her trouble, and starred in films like “Sirens,” “The Englishmen Who Went Up A Hill But Came Down A Mountain” and “Brassed Off.” Currently she’s been a regular on long-running BBC procedural “Waking The Dead,” and its spin-off, “The Body Farm.”
The Character: Selyse Baratheon (née Florent) is Stannis’ wife, and the mariage has never been a happy one. And yet Selyse is a fervent supporter of his priestess Melisandre and her new religion.
Paul Kaye as Thoros Of Myr
Another actor from the series “Spaced. Kaye came to fame playing obnoxious red-carpet interviewer Dennis Pennis on a BBC comedy show. After the character was killed off, he starred in British films like “Blackball” and “It’s All Gone Pete Tong.” Also has a memorable role on TV show “Pulling,” and as Ingram’s stage father in “Matilda.”
The Character: Thoros is a red priest, affiliated to the same religion as Melisandre. He’s also a formidable warrior, and co-founds the Brotherhood Without Banners.
Thomas Brodie-Sangster as Jojen Reed
Sangster first appeared as Liam Neeson’s son in “Love Actually” before going on to star in films like “Nanny McPhee,” “The Last Legion,” “Bright Star” and as Paul McCartney in “Nowhere Boy.” TV roles have included a classic two-part “Doctor Who” and the voice of Ferb in long-running Disney Channel animation “Phineas and Ferb.”
The Character: Jojeen Reed is the son of another aristocratic family who has “greensight,” the power of prophetic dreams. He accompanies Bran, Osha and Hodor as they flee from Winterfell.
Ellie Kendrick as Meera Reed
A young actress who played Juliet at the Globe Theater at 19, Kendrick is probably best known as Carey Mulligan’s best friend in “An Education.” She also played the title role in a BBC version of “The Diary Of Anne Frank,” and has more recently appeared in TV series “Upstairs Downstairs” and “Being Human.”
The Character: The older sister of Jojen, Meera is a skilled huntress who, with her brother, assists and accompanies Bran on his flight from Winterfell.
Kristofer Hivju as Tormund Giantsbane
Hivju played Jonas, a nervous scientist, in last year’s remake/prequel of “The Thing.” Since then, he’s been shooting a role in M. Night Shyamalan’s “After Earth” alongside Will Smith.
The Character: Tormund is a giant-slaying wildling raider, one of Mance Rayder’s most trusted men, with the impressive title “Tall-talker, Horn-blower and Breaker of Ice, Husband to Bears, the Mead-king of Ruddy Hall, Speaker to Gods and Father of Hosts.” Not sure what “husband to bears” means but I’m interested in finding out.
Philip McGinley as Anguy
McGinley is best known for playing Tom Kerrigan on long-running soap “Coronation Street” between 2008 and 2009. More recently, he had a tiny role in “Prometheus.”
The Character: A talented archer, Anguy is another member of the Brotherhood Without Banners.
Anton Lesser as Qyburn
A veteran Shakespearean actor, 60-year-old Lesser has long been associated with the Royal Shakespeare Company, and has been a prolific TV actor in Britain. Most recently, he cropped up in the fourth “Pirates of the Caribbean” and stole the show in excellent BBC program “The Hour.”
The Character: A former maester and skilled physician, Qyburn was stripped of his position after performing experiments on living people. Since then, he’s joined the mercenary band The Brave Companions.
The third season will consist of ten episodes. It will be based roughly on the first half of A Storm of Swords, the third of the A Song of Ice and Fire novels by George R. R. Martin, of which the series is an adaptation.Production began in July 2012 and the series will premiere on March 31, 2013.
The massively huge world created by author George R.R. Martin for his series A Song of Ice and Fire lends itself well to a MMORPG and thankfully that is about to happen. A new video game (which begs to be better than the game released earlier this year) will be called “Game of Thrones: Seven Kingdoms.” The fantasy genre massive multiplayer online role-playing game (MMORPG) is scheduled to be released sometime in 2013.
A trailer was released on July 11th during Comic-Con and it appears that elements from the critically acclaimed HBO series will be included in the game such as the show’s opening credits.
The game will be browser based and will have players pledging allegiances to either the Stark, Lannister, or Barantheon houses to rule the land and the Iron Throne. One drawback is that players can only be human-sized characters, however more character types will be added at a later date. Player-versus-player combat will also be part of the game, as will stealth attacks and brutal sword play. The game takes place after the deaths of King Robert Baratheon and Ned Stark.
The world of the game, at least at the beginning, will include a playable area from the Wall in the north to the south beyond King’s Landing. You won’t actually join directly with a faction, though. Instead, you’ll join a lesser house in Westeros – your guild – that can align with one of the three great houses.Players can also possibly swap allegiance between fractions using bribes and swaying your guild.
Be aware though, once out in the open on the continent of Westeros, player versus environment content will be testing you. While the game is PvP driven, it is possible to level (at least a bit) without them.
In terms of controls, the mechanics of combat will include, “You’ll move with WASD and attack with 1, 2 and 3 keys, which correspond to light, medium and heavy attacks. If you combine the attacks in the right ways you’ll trigger combos and attack faster, and can perform special combo finishers. There isn’t really a strict class system. Instead, you select skills as you go, and there’ll be around 60 available at launch. There’ll also be a weapon leveling system, which should help out if you happen to find a weapon you really like,” according to IGN.
Don’t worry, Mac users! The game is not only free to play but it is will also be compatible for both PC and Mac operating systems. Bigpoint is developing the game with HBO and is known for developing popular games such as Farmerama,Battlestar Galactica Online, and SkyRama.
One of this site’s favorite shows has finally announced the production date of season 3. HBO’s hit series “Game of Thrones” based on the novel series A Song of Ice and Fire by George R.R. Martin, will begin production on its highly anticipated third season early July according HBO.
The third season will see a ton more shooting locations including a brand new country from the GRRM created world that fans have not seen yet.
As with the first and second season, production will continue to be based in Belfast, Northern Ireland, as well as Croatia and Iceland, however, with season three they will add Morocco to the location set. It is believed that the new location will presumably be for the storyline of Daenerys, played by Emilia Clarke.
Along with the production date release, HBO has confirmed the new season’s directors and returning writers. Showrunners David Benioff and D.B. Weiss will get behind the camera in season three to direct episodes. Alex Graves, Michelle MacLaren, Dan Minahan, David Nutter and Alik Sakharov will direct episodes as well. The writers will include Benioff and Weiss, as well as Bryan Cogman, GRRM himself, and Vanessa Taylor.
HBO also assured that the new cast members will be announced soon.
Comic-Con 2012 is right around the corner and if you are planning to attend there are some definite panels you will want to visit.
HBO’s “Game of Thrones” and “True Blood” has recently announced their panels for this year. “Game of Thrones” will be presented in the Large Hall H, a major upgrade for the series. Hall H is traditionally reserved for movies and the most popular of television series and “Game of Thrones” definitely fits the bill. The Thrones panel will take place at the San Diego fan convention on Friday, July 13.
The “True Blood” panel will be Saturday, July 14 in Ballroom 20. The ballroom where True Blood will present, seats about 4,000.
Fans will also be able to view the panel of the favorite fictional serial killer as Showtime’s “Dexter” will be a first-day panel with a Q&A session with the show’s stars, Michael C. Hall (Dexter) and Jennifer Carpenter (Deb).The panel is sure to be a hit given the events of the last season, and fans should know to get there early as it is sure to be packed early on.
According to Showtime, before the panel’s guests arrive, fans will be treated to a first-look at the new season of the animated webisode series Early Cuts: All in the Family – which is narrated by Hall. The animated webisode series will depict the events of Dexter’s often murky past that will reveal new information that will relevant to the upcoming season. It will also focus on Deb when she felt, even early on, that there was something dark about her brother.
Not surprisingly, “The Walking Dead” will be the largest Comic-Con panel of the year sure to amp up the anticipation of the upcoming 16-episode third season. Panelists include veteran actors Andrew Lincoln, Sarah Wayne Callies, Laurie Holden, Norman Reedus, Steven Yeun and Lauren Cohan. Season 3 newcomers Danai Gurira (Michonne) and David Morrisey (The Governor) will also join, much to the excitement of fans. In addition, executive producers Glen Mazzara, Gale Anne Hurd, Robert Kirkman and co-executive producer and special effects make-up supervisor Greg Nicotero will round out the sizable panel, which will be held in Hall H (the convention’s largest venue) at 1:25pm on Friday, July 13. The hour-long session will be moderated by Talking Dead host Chris Hardwick.
Several movie previews are set to air at the convention including The Hobbit and Iron Man 3.
Almost every character in the hit HBO series has killed someone. In fact, most characters have killed several people. While many of them are terrible people who we love to hate, others are actually pretty awesome characters whose killing is overshadowed by everything else they do whether it is protecting the innocent, avenging honor, or repaying debts.
They are the most likable of the badass characters in “Game of Thrones.”
:::Warning Spoilers ahead if you haven’t finished Season 2 or read the books:::
The Hound (Sandor Clegane)
The Hound AKA Sandor Clegane has quickly climbed the ranks to be one of the better characters despite his limited screen time. Despite his brutality and the fact that he enjoys killing, he is very compassionate especially toward Sansa (the little bird). When she is attacked and almost raped after the riot, he swoops in a kills/maims her attackers without a second though or mercy (and with incredible swiftness). But what makes him so badass is that he openly and often defies Joffrey and his cruel treatment of Sansa. Not many characters can get away with saying “fuck the city, fuck the king” without someone trying to kill them or without Joffrey throwing a hissy fit commanding your death.
If you still doubt his badassery, then just watch the Blackwater battle again.
Brienne
Who doesn’t LOVE Brienne? The lady warrior who could kick all of our asses. She is quite possibly one of 5 females in there series who doesn’t use their magic vagina to get ahead. Instead she kicks ass and proves herself worthy of being a knight. Not only is she able to defeat countless men in battle, but she is fiercely loyal, first to Renly then Catelyn, and doesn’t succumb to the weakness of flattery.
She displays some major fighting skills in the season 2 finale which gains her respect from the “best” fighter in Westeros, Jaime, albeit only a little bit at first. And we all know she is perfect match for Jaime if only he wasn’t in love with his sister as they could bang and sword fight all day long.
Tyrion Lannister
Easily not only of my favorite characters but I can guess that he is on most fans favorite character list. He is not only witty and clever but as the brother to the Queen Regent and uncle to the King, he repeatedly stands up to them, calls them out for their selfishness and occasionally cowardly ways, defends the innocent around him. He defends Sansa against Joffrey’s cruel treatment further infuriating him. He also isn’t afraid to call the Queen out for her relationship with her brother and for her child being unmanageable.
He is also not afraid of battle like the “King.” He has killed several people, with a shield, with an axe, probably with his words once or twice. What is also repeatable is that he doesn’t seem to enjoy killing like the majority of those around him, rather he likes cunningly defeating people.
Plus we get amazing gems of Tyrion slapping Joffrey like the little jerk he is:
Oh and this one:
Bronn
I love Bronn, even though he is sellsword who would probably leave everyone and everything for the right price. It started by him willing to fight for Tyrion at the Vale, from here on out he and Tryion were besties, you know the kind where one friend is paying the other for their friendship. Although that doesn’t take away from their bromance, merely enhances is as Bronn would say.
One of the great aspects of Bronn is that he isn’t afraid to tell it straight to Tyrion even if it is something he doesn’t like to hear. He is also an incredibly skilled fighter who would rival that of Jaime and Brienne. He slays several men during the Blackwater battle and is also responsible for shooting the wildfire at the fleet, effectively killing hundreds of men.
Despite his joyful take on killing, his friendship to Tyrion and his sardonic sense of humor that provides some comedic relief for the audience makes him one of the more likable characters in the series.
Jaqen H’ghar
People all over the world are finding themselves strangely attracted to Jaqen (myself included). Whether it is because he talks about himself in the third person, is incredibly enigmatic, knows how to avenge properly and with honor, or he is just that good-looking, it is pretty obvious he is a badass. He can stealthily kill anyone the girl names and does so without even batting an eyelash. He more than easily kills the guards at the gate for Arya to escape. His strength and skill are unmeasurable as we almost never how he kills just the results of it. He never lets his strong guard down except when Arya names his name as the last. He shows his (albeit tiny) vulnerable side as he bargains with her to unsay his name.
But it comes down to this: The man repays his debts and looks sexy while doing it.
Winter is coming HBO… where are you going to stand?
There were nearly 4 million downloads per episode of the HBO hit series, “Game of Thrones” and with that it has become the most pirated TV show of the season giving those HBO bigwigs another reason to create an online HBO subscription (that they will surely ignore).
“Game of Thrones,” which just ended its second season with high viewership for every episode among those who pay for the service. It is not a surprise that its popularity reaches past those who pay to those who pirate.
Restricted availability is one of the top reasons fans pirate the show to staggering amounts. While it isn’t a surprise that the show is the top pirated, but what is surprising is that HBO advocates against piracy but doesn’t have online subscription. I am sure if they offered the service for a measly $15 per month, that 4 million would decrease by at least half if not more and effectively making money for HBO.
HBO plays the exclusivity game and much like the game of thrones, when they play the game of exclusivity they win and we lose.
However, with that comes angry fans who don’t want to buy the expensive costs of adding the channel to their already expensive cable package and instead become pirates or use their friends/families accounts on HBOGo.
For a company that makes money they are surely missing out on some almost guaranteed revenue.
You can see a full list of the top pirated shows below provided by TorrentFreak:
Elena: This episode was, I think, on the whole better for those who only watch the show. I don’t know if that has quite happened enough to be called a trend yet, but I think we are beginning to see points where the changes are chapping even the most calloused of book fans’ asses, and those of us who don’t know what was in the books or should have been on screen don’t question what happens or think less of it, because we have no basis for comparison. We only react to what did happen, not what we thought would happen or what we wanted to happen. Well, the part about what we want may not be totally true—I imagine the internet would have rioted if Tyrion came up with a case of the deads, since we all wanted him to live. So I guess that seems a good time to ask Rachel what she thought of how HBO handled Tyrion’s fall from grace?
Rachel: HBO continues to give Peter Dinklage all the good scenes! But it’s not all jokes. Dinklage is showing Tyrion is one of the more complicated characters in this story. It’s not so fun seeing Tyrion afraid, but waking up after The Blackwater is probably the scariest thing Tyrion’s ever experienced. Ending the season with the cocky Tyrion in a forgotten room, unsure about his health or his future is pretty pitch perfect.
Pycelle is back up, Tyrion is down, and I don’t think any of us know what to think of Shae. I loved that scene between Shae and Tyrion. Shae is the only person Tyrion ever confides his fears in, the person he shows any weakness to, and she in turn always tells him exactly what she thinks. Her dismissal of his “I’m a monster” statement is pretty much how I felt about his injury. POOR BABY. You got a booboo?
I knew they weren’t actually going to chop off his nose and force Dinklage to wear a terrible prosthetic for the rest of the series. I’m hoping they keep it extra juicy and infected looking otherwise, we’re in the same situation I felt when I saw The Phantom of the Opera, and Gerard Butler’s HIDEOUS FACE was really just a handsome dude with a sunburn….
Not gonna lie, when Tyrion cried I definitely got choked up. What do you think Elena, do you trust Shae with Tyrion’s emotionally scarred heart?
Elena: This was the episode where you feel sorry for Tyrion because he was riding high and thinking he was the big man in King’s Landing only to get brought lower than ever when his dad strolls in and saves the day with the Knight of Fucking Flowers (literally….Loras fucks flowers. Peach blossoms, specifically. Like what I did there?), and suddenly it’s like Tyrion was never in King’s Landing and had nothing to do with saving it. Joffrey gets to sit there and pretend like he didn’t piss himself on the battlements, Tywinning lets his horse shit all over the throne room, and Tyrion isn’t even allowed to watch the joy of Papa Lannister starting to put his dipshit grandson in his place (because you know if anyone can control King Fucktard the First, it is Tywinning). Instead Tyrion is in a monk’s cell somewhere with Maester Pycelle cackling over getting revenge for the beard-trimming, while Tyrion is moping and being depressed over the fact that he is now “a monster as well as a dwarf.” Um, I think that line made more sense in the books. Having a pretty clean battle scar isn’t quite enough to make someone a monster, especially not in a land where the men in charge are, as The Hound likes to point out, killers and knights themselves. Probably half the lords in Westeros have battle scars. They just make a man look like…well, a man. Welcome to the big boy club, Tyrion.
As to Shae, I am reluctantly impressed with her that she chose to stay with him. I almost think she means it. Maybe she still sees him as just the best thing that’s ever happened to her and a better prospect than anything else she could find, but she seemed genuine in her anger on his behalf. Fuck this place and these people, they don’t respect you so let’s just leave. Tyrion would be no one across the sea, even if he still had money, so she can’t just be with him because of his being a Lannister. I might not “get” their relationship but it seems like it’s being built into a real one, maybe not Robb and Talisa style lusty and frantic love but the solid, trusting kind of love. At this point I trust her not to run out on him…but I don’t trust her not to get herself killed off or imprisoned and then used against him later.
Rachel: The cut from the Tyrion/Shae scene to Robb and Talisa being married was hilarious. Those tricksy writers! Also hilarious? The entire wedding scene.
WUT? That was the cheesiest, stupidest thing I’ve ever seen! Let’s be real…if Talisa is from Volantis, girl doesn’t know any chants about the Seven! They were married under the Seven when Robb is supposed to be the King of the GOD DAMN NORTH?!
This show can be so uneven about details! Robb is also part Tulley, so fine. There’s your argument for the ceremony, and this all would have made perfect sense had he married Jeyne Westerling. But he didn’t. They changed her to Talisa and made up this hugely complicated reason for why she’s even on the continent in the first place, so it would only make sense they be married in the Northern tradition, and I realize this is nitpickery of the highest order but I’m just going to be that person right now.
Cut later to Cat trying to tell Robb what an ASSHOLE he has been to the Freys…too much is being made of how disrespectful Robb was to Cat (duh, he just defied her wishes and married some landless ho, and you think he’s going to apologize?) and not enough about how there is one angry Bridge-having family out there. Robb has mightily offended the Freys and as yet has no siblings to placate them with other marriages. He’s lost Winterfell to Theon. He’s ignored every piece of advice Roose Bolton has given him.
Robb might be pretty, but he doesn’t even have the family duty that Ned had and so might win the award for Stupidest Main Character of Season 2. Elena, do you agree?
Elena: CONCURMENT ACHIEVED.
Normally I am pro following your heart. And, Robb, I GET why you want to marry a woman you think is going to be a better queen for you and an inspiration to your people, someone hard and yet gentle, tough and yet compassionate, strong and brave and independent. The thing is, you are being very un-Stark right now. Is that your Tully side creeping out? Are any of Ned’s children proper Starks? Maybe Jon should count himself lucky he’s Ned’s bastard and not another Tully spawn, since that set of genes is starting to seem overpowering.
Because here’s the problems I have with Robb’s decision making. First, it’s unnecessary. Talisa is obviously willing to be kept on the side if you are where her heart is. Maybe that doesn’t bear up once you’re actually married, but maybe it does. She seemed like she understood. Second, it wrecks an allegiance and will piss off your bannermen. It makes you look kind of…well, not a man of your word. The reason they are following you is because you were a Stark. Being a not a man of your word is basically saying you’re a Stark only in name. How can they trust you now? Especially when you didn’t ride back to retake Winterfell? You aren’t keeping your promises to your allies or your own kin…how can any man who rides with you expect you to keep a promise to him now?
The thing about building trust is, it means you keep promises even when it is really inconvenient or hard for you to do that. You should have kept the bridge. I hope you don’t regret burning it too much later. I hope Talisa’s magical hoo-ha is enough to hold your throne.
Yeah. Good luck with that.
So speaking of Winterfell…shall we swing North for a bit?
Rachel: God, the Winterfell scenes are where I went from a smiley, happy TV-watcher to an increasingly grimacing, pissed-off book person. WHAT IS HAPPENING, YOU GUYS? The majority of the changes make sense to me. They’ve streamlined Theon’s journey (gotten rid of Reek entirely?) and decided that it’s just easier for the Iron Born to hit Theon over the head, burn Winterfell down, and leave.
Right? At this point I kind of don’t know what the heck is happening. I have my theories about how to get to the next stage, but since this is a no-spoil discussion, you guys are just going to have to hit me up on Twitter for them.
Meanwhile Osha, Bran, Rickon, and Hodor emerge from the Winterfell crypts to a devastated and empty, largely bodiless Winterfell. (One can only assume the Iron Born took people with them). The only one left was the dying Maester Luwin. The scene in which he says good bye was rather powerful and drives home that the North is a place of Duty and Honor. Under the Heart Tree he bids Bran go North. We even got to hear Rickon speak like a human being instead of a feral child (I was genuinely shocked when he said something and sounded normal). Super sad. Bran is now on his own. His only adult ally is a wildling woman, plus he has a simpleton and the direwolves (YAY DIREWOLVES! DID YOU SEE THEM? I LUFF THEM). Rickon has mastered speech, which is a definite plus, but I don’t know how much fighting he can do? Give the kid a rock I guess.
Between the Iron Islands being in open revolt, Winterfell burned to the ground and its people killed or scattered, Jon far beyond the Wall, and Robb stuck somewhere in the Riverlands with decreasing options…looks like the Starks are in for a hell of a season 3.
Elena: Okay, am I the only one who had zero doubts about what happened at Winterfell? Asha took her 500 knights and surrounded it, then went annoying-sister apeshit on her brother. I figured the men on the inside with him recognized that horn and that’s how they knew to just bonk him on the head and go home. Then Asha the expert pillager burned a stone keep down. If anyone can do it without dragons, it’s her. I mean, self-evident, right?
I heard from Rachel that this was not obvious if you had read the books because you were expecting something else to happen.
You guys: this is why I’m not reading the books until show’s done. It’s just so much more enjoyable for me to watch, not only when I don’t know what’s coming but also when I don’t expect one thing and get something else.
Anyway, about Maester Luwin’s suggestion to Theon that he run to The Wall. Luwin had an interesting comment, that he doesn’t serve the family—he serves the place. I wasn’t sure he meant it until he said all that about the Night’s Watch. He really did want to save Theon from himself.
Too late. Theon was all ready to go down in a blaze of glory…only to have his sister take that away from him. But the sequence just proves all over again that he’s not really getting the Iron Islander ethos. I cannot imagine any pirate being willing or interested in a martyr’s death when there is a tunnel to escape via. The fact that Theon was ready to choose death over being seen as a coward is very much a Winterfell thing. Pirates don’t give a shit about how they are seen. They give a shit about staying alive and getting their plunder. Why would they die for a shitty keep on a shitty steppe somewhere shitty and not by the sea? That was Theon’s last gasp of hatred for the Starks. Guess he really did hate them. I can tell you why, Robb….
I look forward to seeing what happens to Theon now that he has been pwned by his sister once again.
Shall we speak of happier things? Tell me what you liked best about this episode.
Rachel: The throne room was my favorite scene in the entire episode. A bunch of powerful liars in a room together being forced to pay homage to a megalomaniac douche. HA HA. It’s amazing. From Tywin refusing to walk anywhere on foot, to the farce of putting Sansa aside in favor of the vast wealth and men of the Tyrells. Hilarious. When Maergery made her speech about having a love for Joffrey take root deep inside her, the only person I felt bad for was Joffrey. He’s the only one in the room who doesn’t seem to understand that everyone is full of shit. A castle full of vipers ready to devour him; the only thing holding them back is tradition and his chaotic behavior.
IT’S GONNA BE GOOD.
Anyone else hear Sansa echo Cersei’s “Enjoy” when Maegaery stepped into the limelight? Stupid Littlefinger had to ruin it by creeping in like he always does with his “you’re not free, yet!” speech. Go creep on Harrenhal, Petyr! I hear it’s LOVELY there!
No, I love Littlefinger. They’ve made him inscrutable in the show by making him tell everyone his plans, all the plans being different. It’s just as effective as book Littlefinger, who mostly keeps everything to himself but the pointing and the laughing. The end result is “creepy fucker who knows too much and says too little of substance,” and that’s all we can really hope for.
Elena: I was laughing my ass off through this entire sequence. From that perfect plop of horse shit (seriously, I think they just made everyone wait while the camera rolled on that horse’s ass until it dropped a load) to Joffrey’s haplessness in the face of grown-ups to Sansa’s amazing acting skills…goodness. I WANT MORE OF THIS, PLEASE. Rachel and I talked on one of the podcasts about the lack of courtly flourishes and politicking in the show thus far. This was the first scene where we really got to see it in full flower, the platitudes and false speaking and posturing and obeisance to the proper form.
I will admit, I was not actually sure Joffrey understood he was allowed to set Sansa aside. I believed him when he told Margaery he could not break his vow…like I thought he actually meant that. I thought that because of how confused he looked when Pycelle stepped forward again and said the gods didn’t require him to keep promises to traitors.
I hope he was the only one in the room not acting, because that underscores that the point Littlefinger made to Sansa is also true of Joffrey: it’s a room full of liars, every one of them better than you. Joffrey, for all that he has been invested with the powers of the kingship, is still a little boy who wants to be led except when he is throwing a tantrum. He is weak, malleable, and dangerous only because he is marginally insane. If he did not have that edge of psychosis…he would be an utter puppet. Instead he will become a puppet through the manipulation of his weaknesses and ignorance and self-absorption.
I am sooooo interested to see Margaery square off against Cersei. I think in her Cersei will find an apter pupil than she did in Sansa…and someone who will not overtly compete with her. The longer I’ve had to think about this, the more convinced I am that Cersei wanted Sansa gone because Sansa threatened her—threatened to expose Cersei for what she is and be an example of what she should have been but isn’t. Sansa was too scared and ignorant to realize that every time she said the perfect thing or showed just that flash of ladylike courage, it made her more and more unacceptable to Cersei. Sansa would have made a tragic but noble figure as Joffrey’s queen. She could make someone like The Hound disobey his master for her sake. She had the ability to inspire pity and pride and loyalty…and it would be loyalty to HER, not to the king. And since she is the daughter of a man killed as a traitor for being too honest and too honorable, and the sister of a rebel king…a city of people more loyal to her than her husband must have made Cersei’s butthole pucker up with fear.
Margaery, on the other hand, will not overtly compete with Cersei because she will be playing the game of eager queen-to-be learning the game from her mother-in-law. She understands that it is a game, and overt competition will be the quickest way to lose what she has within her grasp.
Littlefinger’s bit at the end was priceless. The people at work thought he did it out of kindness, out of love for Cat. Hahahahahaha. Oh, hell, no. He might have a weakness for Catelyn Tully Stark in that he still has emotions about her…but I don’t believe for a second he still loves her. I think he still wants revenge for that rejection. I was shocked he didn’t offer to marry Sansa just to keep her safe from Joffrey…wouldn’t that be the ultimate in your FACE to his old love? Marry the daughter who looks just like her but is ten times more submissive, so he not only upgrades to the younger model as an older man but also upgrades it to a personality he can completely control? Personally, I think that is his goal.
Sansa best watch herself if she stays in King’s Landing.
GIRL, YOU SHOULD HAVE GONE WITH THE HOUND!
Rachel: Can we talk about Stannis now?
My favorite lobster king is having issues with being so thoroughly defeated, but then again who wouldn’t be having a hissy in their high tower table-map room if they just got Tywinned ten seconds before total victory?
I feel for you, Stannis. I feel. And I can understand why a godless man who yearns for greatness, such as yourself, would stare into the ambient lighting and see your inevitable greatness staring back at you. Clearly Stannis hasn’t given up.
Or they’re just crazy.
Even then, I would expect Stannis to talk about his missing, presumed dead, right hand man Ser Onion! NO TEARS FOR YOUR BESTIE? C’mon Stannis!
Look into the flames! Do you smell onions?
Elena: I don’t have much to say about this scene, since, obviously Stannis wasn’t going to give up the war just because he lost the battle, and just as obviously Melisandre is going to make sure she has a firmer hand on the second campaign. But all I could think watching it was how much he looked like Eric in The Little Mermaid when that evil sea witch has him under her spell. And then their relationship suddenly made perfect sense, and I felt really sorry for Stannis.
Even more sorry for Davos, who lost his son to that bitch’s shell spell!
Ugh. Let’s go someplace where the bad guys don’t win! Like…Jaime and Brienne!
Rachel: Ya know, strictly speaking, book-Brienne wouldn’t have vengefully castrated that guy to kill him. But I think it makes her more interesting when she is more overtly pissed off about how women are treated in Westeros. It’s nice. In a cast of characters that feature plenty of strong and interesting female characters, not many of them are outspoken about the role of women in their society. Cersei complains but acquiesces; Arya is still too young for her rejection of feminine roles to be a social statement. Asha is an interesting case, as she fills in for her father’s absent sons, but the contrast between her and Brienne is that Asha embraces traditionally masculine roles without any regret, while Brienne is far more sensitive. Forced into masculine roles in order to gain agency for herself while at the same time pushed away from feminine roles due to her size and appearance—at time it seems that Brienne had no choice. It was either take control of her life through violence or live life as an unloved, mocked wife of whatever man offered her father the best deal. Something Asha doesn’t have to contend with – plenty of men find her appealing, and it seems the Greyjoys have no compunctions about women inheriting.
The relationship between perfect manly man/family honor Jaime and imperfect female/imperfect male family rejecting Brienne is, as I have said before, one of the best relationships in the entire series. They make each other more interesting simply by being in each others’ proximity! Not to mention the hilarity of no bullshit Brinne calling out Jaime’s every utterance.
The cast is only going to get bigger as we move into season 3, but I hope to see much more of The Jaime and Brienne Show!
Elena: This sequence. Oh, my god, this sequence. I think it might have been my favorite moment of the show when Brienne kills those Stark men and we see Jaime’s face in the aftermath. And he’s basically like, “I…might not be able to beat her. Holy shit, this woman is FIERCE.” Like…Brienne is such a badass that she turned Jaime Fucking Kingslayer into a lisping gay man for a couple seconds. That was amazing.
So can I confess something? I didn’t realize the bodies were women until they talked about them being she’s. I thought Brienne was just that respectful at first, which seemed oddly naïve, but one thing I will say about Westeros…there has been a lot of abusing of women but not too much killing of them, at least so far. So her reaction, even aside from any considerations of latent anger a lady knight might have about the way women are treated by men, made more sense. In fact, WAS it anger on behalf of women (vs men) so much as it was anger on behalf of INNOCENTS (vs ravagers and false knights)?
Either way I’m glad they stopped. I’m glad we got to see her in action one more time this season, I’m glad Jaime got to see it so maybe he’ll stop mouthing off every five minutes, and I’m glad we got to see the complicating factor of her not working for the Starks but only Catelyn. That…is going to come back later, I sense.
Rachel: And in things that just won’t stop coming back…Ros met Varys.
While I LOVE me some quality Varys time…this scene was bull. Like Varys would stroll into Petyr’s whore house in broad daylight to offer his top whore a spying position? HBO is really trying to make Ros happen for us. I won’t deny that she might know her share of juicy bits—isn’t that what Petyr uses her for? I think this scene was just an excuse for the writers to reiterate that while Petyr seems to desire legitimate and public power, the motivations of Varys are still pretty unknown. Sex doesn’t work on him, so Petyr is at a disadvantage when it comes to manipulating his rival (are they rivals?), but Petyr might be in better with the nobility – since HBO sent him on a tour of Westeros this season.
You never know with Varys. All you really know is that he’s a eunuch. HBO seems really fixated on telling us that repeatedly. And we know that whatever Ros decides, no one wants to be stuck between Littlefinger and the Spider.
Elena: This scene just made no sense to me. I expect Varys is right and Littlefinger is criminally underusing her. But do we really think Littlefinger doesn’t have a line onto every man (or woman) who walks into his brothel? Come on. He’s not going to let his Commader Ros Riker of the whoreship Cunterprize become a spy for his greatest enemy. Please.
If HBO takes that route and she survives more than two episodes of it, I call bullshit. Maybe they just wanted a scheme to kill her off?
Oh, and speaking of characters killed off: Goodbye, Jaqen H’ghar!
Rachel: It’s time for terrible poetry.
Goodbye Jaqen H’ghar
we have watched you from afar
kill every man the wolf desired
and part your hairso ’twas two colored.
Elena is going to ask me if you ever come back
I will distract her with Syrio flack
a beauteous man if there ever was
a deadly genie, a faceless one.
Elena: RIP, Hot Jaqen! Your new face did NOT amuse me. But I know why you did it: you didn’t want Arya to regret her choice. I would not regret that choice after seeing your new mug, so well done.
Also…where the fuck are all these different magical people coming from? None of them are from the Seven Kingdoms. What is up with that? No indigenous magic on the entire fucking continent? Rachel likes to call the Stark kids wargs and snarl about the fact that HBO is cutting their connection to their wolves and Bran’s prophecy-dreaming, so what else is indigenous to this part of the world that we aren’t learning about? I mean, across the sea we have the witches like Melisandre, the Faceless Men, the sorcerers of Qarth, the Targaryens and their fire-magic…what happened here? Why didn’t they have all this shit? No wonder they were so fucking defenseless when the Targaryens showed up with their dragons. And if the Targaryens were all that was keeping it off the continent…no wonder all of these new beings are adventuring across the sea now!
Anyway, on the Arya plot front…we now have the Continuing Adventurs of Arya and Hot Pie and Gendry. Arya wants to find Robb or rescue Sansa. I love that she finally remembers her sister. Has Sansa thought about her at all? She would never have brought Arya up, of course, since that is obviously a subject you just don’t talk about in front of…well, anyone in King’s Landing since they all have egg on their face for Arya escaping without a trace. But I wonder if she thinks about her. Surely? But Arya was the one whom Ned reminded that blood is blood, and when winter comes family will matter more than anything.
Interestingly, given that Starks at least start as the focal point of the series, the action across two seasons so far has been to put as much distance as possible between all of the Stark children. They are all separated from their family right now. They all have to make new families…Arya with her boys, Robb with Talisa and his men, Jon with his brother crows and now the Wildlings, Bran and Rickon with Osha. Sansa…Sansa is the only one truly alone. Poor little bird.
Dany and the House of the Undying (are all her dothraki back from the dead?):
Rachel: I would probably have made it through the episode in enjoyment despite the Winterfell confusion if not for everything that happens with Dany and Jon (who I will get to in a second).
Ugh… I feel like such a chump! Getting all “Elena, TAKE NOTES WHEN PEOPLE TALK TO DANY IN THE HOUSE OF THE UNDYING”. Um…yea, about that….
WHAT IS FRAGGITY FRACK SHIT HUH?
Can I just say that not ONE of the “visions” Dany saw in that episode occurred in the book? Do I treat them as canon? IN which case – did HBO just spoil the hell out of us by showing us the Iron Throne covered in ash, the ceiling burned away by what we assume would be Dany’s dragon fire?
DID THAT JUST HAPPEN?
And the Drogo thing – I guess it was nice that we got a cameo, but, damn, that fake beard was gross looking! EWWW DON’T TOUCH IT.
So yea, I was hoping for at LEAST the “Three” prophecy since Dany uses it to examine and govern her decisions from here on out. It’s so disappointing to see one of the most important moments in a favorite character’s storyline get completely and utterly cut. Sigh. I’m also going to assume that the dragons succeeded in burning down the house of the Undying? I get it – the fire budget was all used up in “The Blackwater.”
Just…go, Dany. Go buy a ship. Go somewhere. LEAVE QARTH. Leave weirdly and for no reason at all heterosexual Xaro. Leave him and thatdumb ho, Doreah, locked up in that empty vault. TAKE the golden peacock! (BTW – raise your hand if you were all, “Where did all of Dany’s Dothraki come from? Weren’t they all dead?)
March onward to your incredibly boring Feast and Dance storylines! ONWARD, I SAY! And this time you don’t even have an idea of what direction to go in because you never heard Quaithe’s “you must go East to go West” prophecy, either!
So…just…go. Go be aimless. Have some temper tantrums. Lose your dragons repeatedly. I don’t even care anymore.
Elena: I was underwhelmed by the House of the Undying itself. It seemed…well, honestly, here’s what it seemed. It seemed like that could have been an entire episode by itself—I mean, Labyrinth made a feature film out of the exact same premise—and because it could not be its own episode, the true threat or power of the place was diminished. I felt like there should have been traps there, or more obvious prophetic type visions…something besides a couple random flashes of other places and a quick jaunt from The Wall to the Nightlands (or wherever Drogo was supposed to be).
That being said…the ending of her sequence, both endings really, was fucking awesome. When she looked at those chains and then at her dragons and was like…fuck this. Dragons, take my fury and make it burn. MAKE IT ALL BURN…I think I squealed like a school girl. That was the best. And I was just thinking…um, sorcerer? I know your powers just came back and you’re feeling your oats and everything, but…what part of DRAGONFIRE do you not quite get?
The ending with the empty vault was also fabulous. I half-jokingly wrote “watch it be empty” in my live blog and then got to feel uber-smart when it turned out to be true. What a clever man he was! All he had to do to be the richest man in Qarth was TELL everyone he was the richest man in Qarth so many times they eventually stopped asking for proof! Amazing! I actually wonder how many of the so-called richest men in Qarth were actually rich at all, or if they all just put their actual wealth into their world-at-hand and kept nothing in reserve but pretended they had ten times more where that came from? Was Qarth basically the double-mortgaged American gated community of Westeros? Where everyone drives a Lexus but lives in an unfurnished house and eats nothing but beans and rice because they have no money left to spend?
So Dany has enough for a small ship, and now her dragons have found their fire. I still don’t think it’s enough for her to go “home” yet.
This is something Rachel mentioned to me in our drunkcast, that Dany sees things in the House of the Undying that shape her decisions from here on. The fact that she didn’t makes me wonder if she is going to continue to have her agency as an individual undermined by plot events that force her path to turn, versus her choosing to turn onto a different path? Like will she get shipwrecked instead of choosing to wait to cross the sea until she can do it on the back of a dragon because she saw a vision of herself flying into the Seven Kingdoms for the first time? That sort of putting her at the mercy of tangential forces rather than making her the centrifuge of her own momentum. I much prefer characters who both have agency but are forced to react to the world around them. Even when they make poor choices (cough *Robb* cough), I still prefer the ones who are able to be actors and not simply reactors.
Rachel: Speaking of visions left out of The House of the Undying scene was one which, coupled with a memory/dream of Ned’s that the writers left out of Season 1, is the basis for a theory on Jon’s parentage. But that seems to have been erased from the show, so please GOD don’t bother Googling any algebra equations that solve for J. (Really, don’t. You’ll be spoiled IMMEDIATELY about events because the internet assumes if you are Googling book theories that you have read the books).
And that isn’t even the stuff that had me all mad and yelling in the street (actual. I was yelling in the street). No, see…I’m pissed off about Jon vs. The Halfhand. Because they spent all damn season stretching the storyline beyond the Wall. Spending multiple episodes at Craster’s Keep and digging latrines and chasing girls through the snow, and they didn’t have TEN SECONDS for Qhorin to tell Jon that one pivotal line, “When the time comes, you do what they ask of you.” Because Jon kills the Halfhand UNDER ORDERS. Not because Qhorin spends a bunch of time pushing him and calling his mother a whore – but because Qhorin knows that if the wildlings have captured him they will kill him slowly, OR his death can be used by Jon to gain acceptance into their group as a deserter. Couple that with Jon playing it like he killed the Halfhand because he can and wants to fuck Ygritte – that’s what this scene should have been. Instead it’s a stupid scene. A STUPID SCENE. Is it clear that Jon did not want to kill one of his heroes? Is it clear that Jon is doing this to gain information about the army that Mance Rayder is massing beyond the wall because it is a threat to the realm?
Is Jon just too much of a traditional fantasy hero with a special destiny to make it in the big bad world of HBO dramas? It’s like, “Oh, ya know, Jon is too good. Let’s make him a fucking dick. We can call him stupid for an entire season and then have him kill the old guy at the end for being disrespectful.” Was that a round table discussion or is this a result of over editing?
Ughhhhhh. UGHHHHHHHHHH!!! I’M SO MAD ABOUT IT AHHHHH!
And then there’s the scene at the very end, at what I am assuming is the Fist of the Firstmen? Sam and co (YAY DOLOROUS ED) have been digging latrines for approximately 12 episodes, and they hear the three horn blasts that mean Walkers. So everyone runs back to camp except for Sam, who hides behind a rock and watches the Others come by on their undead horses directing the movement of a whole mess of White Walkers. Remember the Walkers we saw last season when Jon injured his hand? Remember how they were fast and strong and scary as hell?
Now look at these Walkers.
Do they not seem a little…Shaun of the Dead to you?
Whatever. At this point I’m just over here mumbling about the honor of Jon Stark and how Qhorin Halfhald is a HERO!
Elena: Rachel’s reaction is what happens when HBO tries to be subtle. The elements of this being a hugely pivotal (except not at all because he was only faking!) role in Jon’s life are there. We have heard the boys whispering about how that’s Qhorin Halfhand, and I think it was explained to Sam who he is. We had Qhorin’s comment to Jon LAST episode we saw them, “I hope you can do what needs to be done when the time comes.”
But the way this was staged…weak. It made Jon look like a little Lord of Winterfell who is lost North of The Wall, not a man of the Night’s Watch who is consciously rejecting that life.
Maybe the show writers wanted to slow down Jon’s growth from an angry youth to a full man, and thought that showing him make that kind of momentous decision less than a year after leaving home was too soon. Maybe they thought we thought the Wildlings would see more potential in a malleable youth than a man of strong convictions. Or maybe they really are doing what Rachel suggested and trying to diminish the most admirable sides of the characters it’s easiest to like in the books because HBO doesn’t like its viewers to have easy heroes.
I don’t know what their decision process was. But I know this: I was confused about why Qhorin was talking about Jon’s parents. That Jon could be goaded to kill a man for calling his mother a whore has exactly dick to do with his willingness to join the Wildlings. Jon has been captured. It’s not like he’s getting back to The Wall ever anyway, most likely…so it’s not like he could have been thinking (er…if it wasn’t planned that he kill the Halfhand) afterward that “oh, shit, killing the Halfhand means I can’t go back. Oops, guess I’ll just join the Wildlings then.” And from the Wildlings point of view, the fact that he killed Qhorin Halfhand in a fit of rage for insulting his mother would just make him look more dangerous a prisoner, but not a more likely prospect for conversion to their cause. Jon wasn’t fighting for his freedom in their eyes, but from hot emotion. The fact that he won would have made him look like a badass, sure, but they would have watched that battle, shrugged at the outcome, bound him tighter, and walked on. They would not have looked at him and said “now you are one of us.” It. Made. No. Sense.
If Jon and Qhorin had been arguing about loyalty to the Night’s Watch, and not betraying secrets and their brothers, and Jon was like “Fuck the Night’s Watch, I didn’t want to go but I had nowhere else, I’m 17 years old and I’ve never really kissed a girl and the Night’s Watch wants me to die an old man—or a young one—who has never really kissed a girl, so fuck that, and fuck you if you don’t like it.” HAD THAT BEEN THEIR ARGUMENT THE “HE’S ONE OF US! HUZZAH!” REACTION MAKES PERFECT SENSE.
But, y’all, that was not Jon and Qhorin’s argument.
This is not to mention…there was no retaliation from the Wildlings for him killing their most valuable prisoner? COME THE FUCK ON. If they know enough about who Qhorin is to be impressed that Jon killed him, then why on earth would they have let him be killed? They all just formed up a sparring ring and let them have blades, really? Because it’s not like King North of The Wall Mance Fucking Raider would have wanted to debrief Qhorin Halfhand or anything. Not at all. No chance of that! The Wildlings reaction was just…unbelievable, when I sat down later and thought it through.
I am also upset over the future interplay between Jon and Ygritte now that the fight was about his whore mother (or was she?) and not his desire to be his own man and have his life back. Because if he had said “I’m taking my life back” then he would have had to put a move on her. This way, he can still be all emo and reluctant to bed her until he realizes it’s part of his disguise and mopes about it for an episode first. I would much rather see him take a positive action to embrace his own sexuality rather than having to be seduced. Sigh. As much as I am all in favor of ladies doing it—Talisa style—that doesn’t mean I want MEN to be the ones getting seduced against their will and understanding and moral code.
Actually…looking back at the sex we’ve seen this season…the bulk of it by far has been women seducing men against their better judgment and very much being the sexual aggressors. And I am quite sad to realize that perhaps the most sexually equitable relationship IN THE ENTIRE FUCKING SHOW so far has been Cersei and Jaime. You guys, there is something seriously fucked up when the people with the healthiest sexual relationship are the twins doing each other.
I’m actually quite serious about this. Talisa pulled a romance novel hero on Robb where she was like, “I’m going to seduce you even though morally you are reluctant because you will enjoy it, so just like back (or stand back, whatever) and let me do the rest.” Fine, so they are probably healthy up after he makes his choice about it, but still, putting your boobs in a man’s face and expecting him to make a morally responsible decision at that moment is…questionable at best. Cersei is using her power as Queen and Head Bitch Lannister in Charge to use Lancel at her whims. Margaery is more than a match for poor Renly…or would have been, had he lived. Melisandre and Stannis? What black magic did she use to overcome his normally prosaic and plodding moral compass? Osha having to do nothing to slit Theon’s throat in his sleep (had she so chosen) except drop her robe.
And then in the more traditional roles of men using women we have Craster with his daughters, all the whores who got fucked and abandoned or abused along the season, and Shae, whom Tyrion might love but who is still paid for her work and that puts her in a position of subservience at least until she can make him so in love with her he’ll do anything to keep her (at which point she moves to unhealthy column #1). Regardless of what is worked out after the wedding, any woman married off for political reasons is, as Cersei put it so elegantly, being “sold like a horse so he could ride me whenever he wanted.” So…yeah. Where’s the healthy couple with no power dynamic or discrepancy at play? The most fucked up relationship of them all.
I had not really thought about this until now. Just wow. Possibly most fascinating is that in aggregate this season has had a lot of exploration of female sexuality as a weapon. Back to Cersei, who seems to just be speaking all the truths, telling Sansa to learn how to use it. So much for women being helpless…but Margaery Tyrell already proved that being more feminine than most can be much more powerful than Sansa made it seem.
Overall Thoughts on Season 2
Rachel: All in all I found Season 2 to be much more uneven than Season 1. It had some absolutely fantastic episodes and moments, but it also seems to be slipping dangerously close to re-imagining. Season 1 was so true to the novels, and with all the events and characters we’ll see from the Storm of Swords storyline – this show could easily go the way of HBO’s other fantasy series and look upon the books as mere inspiration for the show itself rather than a guide to the storyline.
Maybe that won’t happen. Maybe they’re stretching some revelations in order to up the drama of the Season 3 premiere. Here’s hoping, because as much as I love Tyrion Lannister and all the other baddies of Westeros, it’s the heroes that keep me coming back, and so far HBO seems to be ignoring them.
Elena: I enjoyed Season 2 much more than Season 1, and I think that had to do with my having read the first book (or, mostly). I do hope Rachel is wrong and the show maintains a decent amount of integrity toward the source material, that they have a plan for all the sideplots they are lopping off or shortening or shifting about.
For Season 3 I am hoping for more of the courtly politics and intrigue, and some more characters to meet up the way Jaime and Brienne have. For example I think Sam and Bran would become BFF’s if they met.
In the meantime, everyone is in a safe (enough) harbor, and I am content to gestate my anticipation for a full nine months before shadowbabying forward to Season 3.
If you are the ultimate “Game of Thrones” fan (and have tons of money to shell out) then spend season three next year watching from your life size replica of the Iron Throne. The throne is on sale for a measly $30,000 with an extra $1,800 in shipping costs.
HBO’s online store is selling the “”hand-finished, hand-painted fiberglass and fire-proof resin” versions that are identical to the one featured on the show and in the novel series. According to the mythology of George R.R. Martin’s fantasy novels, the Iron Throne was constructed by former king Aegon Targaryen, the first king of the Seven Kingdoms, who built the throne from the thousands of swords taken from his defeated enemies. The throne was built over 59 days of constant hammering to get the swords into position and much is made of how uncomfortable it is to sit in. So maybe you won’t sit in it too often.
The replicas are over 7 feet tall and weigh 350 pounds. The official specs are:
Height: 7’2
Depth: 5’11
Width: 5’5
Weight: 350 pounds
Since going on sale Tuesday morning there hasn’t been any information on whether anyone has bought the chair but surely only a Lannister could afford it anyway.
Rachel: What did you think of the episode overall?
Elena: I loved what HBO did with “The Blackwater.” I thought it was totally ballsy for them to drop more than half their storylines for an entire episode to focus completely on this siege. I also felt it was a risk for their production team to get into this level of nitty-gritty detail with the logistics of a battle.
Could they balance the moments of dramatic tension with the action sequences their budget allowed for well enough to keep everything on point and engaging? Did they have enough of a budget to make a satisfying attack on King’s Landing at all? Both of which questions they managed to answer with a resounding “yes.”
The attack on King’s Landing had character moments, it had one huge sequence with the wildfire burning half the fleet, it had plot advancement, and it had some pretty nice scenes of battle action. Even though we didn’t really get a macro shot of the attack on Mud Gate itself, that was fine—the close-up on certain characters’ experiences mirrors how this entire story is told. Game of Thrones becomes epic via a vast pastiche of minor moments, not because it is heavy on epic moments. That was how the battle was structured, and it worked for me.
Elena: Stannis just wants to be sure we all know he is a badass, and possibly touched by R’hllor. That’s why he has no helmet.
Rachel: Maybe they didn’t put a helmet on Stannis because they are overly concerned the audience will not recognize a main character. HBO does think the audience is comprised entirely of people who only watch GoT while walking back and forth between the couch and the fridge, who can’t spell their own names let alone read the books and remember who is on which side of whatever battle….
Maybe they just didn’t have any money left in the budget for helmets because they BLEW UP ALL THE MONEY.
Ugh…the bitterness. It flows through me. Excuse me, I have to go be Zen for a moment.
So…we were talking about how Stannis is SO INCREDIBLY BADASS that he doesn’t even need a helmet, because he doesn’t fear death! Stannis knows he is meant to be king and no random peasant is going to lob a rock on HIS destined head, NO SIR!
Maybe Stannis is too busy remembering what it was like to have hair, and standing in the prow of a row boat while cruising along towards his new, way more awesome castle is JUST the place to feel the wind caress his forehead. To feel it lick his temples and noodle in his ears…
I’m getting off track.
But it DOES suck that Stannis came SOOOO CLOSE to winning it all right then and there. Such is your lot, Stannis! Born second. Classic middle child.
Rachel: Varys proves that he hates witches, and that he gives a shit about Westeros: agree, or disagree?
Elena: Agree! Verily I agree.
I really enjoyed the Varys scenes this episode. For the first time I actually felt anything for him, or from him, as a character. He is mildly distasteful in that you know he’s scheming and can’t be trusted (nor can he be trusted to betray you every time! That’s what makes him frustrating to deal with), but I just haven’t known what to make of him up till now. I still don’t know what his game is, but I finally saw a moment of truth from him when he was talking about the witches like Melisandre. He hates them and fears them, and he does not want to see them gaining any power in Westeros. He gives a shit about what happens in Westeros. I felt like the tears in his eyes when he spoke about that were genuine.
When we were discussing this episode, Rachel pointed out to me that Cersei had a moment of tears with Cat, and perhaps these were equally fake (or maybe-fake), but I think they were real. Tears can be a weapon, sure, as they speak to an apparent truthfulness, but what was Varys trying to accomplish if he were faking the emotion? He was talking to Tyrion, and the two of them have obviously allied in some ways. If Varys wants to protect King’s Landing from Stannis and his red woman, and he believes Tyrion is the only one who can help, then maybe he manipulates him that way…except that Varys has to know Tyrion is already as committed as he could ever be to defending the city. Tyrion will be shown no mercy by Stannis. Tyrion is also the sort of person who does what needs to be done no matter what; Varys knows this. So there is nothing his words will encourage or inspire Tyrion to do that Tyrion wasn’t already going to do, ergo he does not need to use that weapon at that time.
So I think Varys was for one brief scene dropping his masks. I still don’t understand him, but I am more intrigued by him for the glimpse of humanity. It was a well-placed moment, as he’s a character who has been a cipher for most of the series so far. Also, because he is so inscrutable most of the time, his feelings towards the witches are more powerful. It makes me wonder if Stannis really knows what he’s doing, meddling with a power like that. It makes me glad Davos was there to talk him into leaving Melisandre behind and taking the city on his own.
…except, with his failure to take the city, will he come back a second time, with her?
Oh my god, y’all, maybe another Shadowbaby will kill Joffrey! That would be amazing. I would be Team Shadowbaby forevah!
Elena: I say this because (SPOILER ALERT) Joffrey fails at everything except pleasing the viewers by dying ignobly.
Rachel: First Rule of Reading AsoIaF – GRRM wants you to suffer.
Plus he seems to be excelling quite well at being a doucheweasel!
Elena: Talk to me about how much you loved Tyrion in this episode. Was it as much as I did?
Rachel: Of course I loved Tyrion. Everyone loves Tyrion. He’s the only normal person in the entire series. He’s craftier, sadder, more tortured, and more insecure in the novels, but since he’s their Emmy winner – HBO is going to make him mostly funny.
So I’m really happy they allowed Peter to do a little frustration, anger and uncertainty in “The Blackwater.” Mixed with bravado and smartassery – VOILA. Show Tyrion. Loved by all! Who am I kidding, when he casually lopped off that one guy’s leg at the knee…I LOLed.
Sometimes, though, it’s hard for me to ever be truly WORRIED about Tyrion – since he is obviously a stand-in for the audience, and GRRM himself. Even more so in the show. Not that I really expected HBO to hack Dinklage’s face off…that was never going to happen. Production, makeup, acting. But kudos for pulling an almost Tarantino with that face slash. It made the inside of my face tingly.
Speaking of faces…seems like those of us living in the States can also fear for our facial symmetry.
No. Let’s move on.
Picking up the slack. Being the only USEFUL Lannister. It’s got to be hard for him seeing as he’s daddy’s least favorite child. Cersei is planning on killing herself and Tommen (leaving Myrcella to what, exactly? THINK IT THROUGH, CERSEI). Joffrey is a little baby – himself a product of some whacky parenting in which his “I should have been born a man, I want to fight” mother apparently never thought her eldest son should receive any martial training at all?
Jaime is off being besties with Brienne, which is actually fine. Otherwise he’d be in King’s Landing, swaggering around, his mere presence forcing Tyrion to leave everything to the elder brother. I like take charge Tyrion. The peasants like him too? Maybe they’ll stop calling him a Demon Monkey?
Rachel: But sadly, best in show goes to Bronn, not Tyrion. Bronn is an expert archer, skilled in hand to hand combat, singing Lannister drinking songs (raise your hand if The National’s cover of “The Rains of Castamere” sent you into barely controlled hysterics), and trading quips with the Hound.
Elena: Holy shit, yes, Bronn has proven to be quite the Renaissance man about Westeros! I actually wondered if he is a Jon Snow of Lannister country (Bronn Stone or whatever they’re called there) who was raised with certain…pretensions. He knows the Lannister song. He can sing in perfect pitch even drunk. He can read. He knows obscure military tacticians. He might be a sell-sword, but…where did he learn swordplay? That’s not how the peasants fight—that’s how lords fight. Knights and landholders. Hm. I have never questioned Bronn’s lowness because mercenaries are so reviled, but now I begin to wonder.
Rachel: Speaking of things we wondered about…WTF was that with Shae at the end?
Elena: Um…. (crickets chirp)
Shae’s last scene befuddled me. I…don’t know what she meant about saying goodbye. Either the city doesn’t fall, and life goes on as it has been, and she stays with Tyrion (even if she can’t stay with Sansa now that Cersei has noticed her), or Stannis takes the city and Tyrion dies. There is no saying goodbye either way. That line just made no sense. It made no sense if she meant it, and it made no sense for her to give a shit about what Sansa thought or did if she was about to run for a tunnel.
I am confused. Curious to see if we ever see Shae again, but only mildly. I never really have gotten into her and Tyrion as a couple. I know he likes low women, but I have the snobbery of a very well-read woman and think he ought to be with someone who can keep up with him intellectually, not someone who is sweet and just feisty enough to challenge his Lannister pride. So I’m kind of meh on their whole relationship. If Cersei succeeded in hurting her, would it hurt him because he really loved her or because he hates to see anyone weaker than himself hurt, especially because of him? The fact that I ask that question tells me I don’t think he really loves her, not the way I understand the word. He just considers her his, and he takes care of his own.
Rachel: Can we talk about Cersei now? Can we?
Elena: Cersei. Cersei, Cersei, Cersei. Why did you have to be such a raging cunt so many times before this? I almost like you after this episode. Sitting there getting drunk, and then getting drunk on telling the truth so you just keep speaking it, because once you say the first uncomfortable truth you realize how good it feels to stop pretending.
I was uncomfortable about how much I related to her in these scenes. The last place I’d want to be is amidst the crying women (although I wouldn’t want to be swinging a sword…I’d rather be alone, getting drunk by myself, at a time like that). And I have a knack for polarizing people into those who love me and those who hate me because I am not very good at not speaking truths. I popped that cork a long time ago. So I got where she was coming from.
Rachel was spot-on in our Skype to say that she kind of falls apart under pressure, though—she’s not being the strong queen the ladies can be inspired by, even though she knows it’s what they want, what the story they tell themselves is supposed to have. She does not deal well with the waiting, with the not knowing, with the inaction. She also does not deal well with what she perceives as an inevitable defeat.
I might actually give her the benefit of the doubt here and suggest that if she were allowed to hold a sword and fight, that she would do it, and bravely, and with no cringing or second thoughts. I think her problem is that she has a masculine personality in a woman’s body and a woman’s role in life. Men are generally not good in that kind of situation. They are fine with the fighting, but the waiting and wondering are hell for them. They are great in short-term crises but not long-term ones, so good at killing enemies one by one and not so good at sickbeds…or behind walls awaiting an outcome.
But Cersei was apparently never quite brave enough to do what, say, Brienne of Tarth has done and reject basically her family and the life she knows to become what she wants, even if that is a role traditionally reserved for men, and so instead she has been warped and twisted by the constraints of her life. She is ill-suited for behaving in the ways women are supposed to behave, but she has never taken control of her life to live it the way she wants. She instead makes petty rebellions, like drinking too much instead of actually inspiring her flock of ladies, or bringing Joffrey in instead of letting him become a king who can inspire his men by leading them in battle.
I found this an interesting contrast to Sansa’s reaction. Sansa was the one who stepped into the role and tried to be a rock for the other women. I have no doubt she would have stayed there indefinitely except for Shae’s quite rational point that Stannis Baratheon would show her mercy where Ser Ilyn would not, and that she should not be in the room with him when the city fell and he decided to kill the women so Stannis could not use them against their families. Now, I know not much has been made of Sansa’s storytelling in the show; from book Sansa I know she would do this via the method of acting like a brave queen in an old ballad, but even with that sort of layering of reality with her fantasy role-playing…she is still standing there and not breaking down. It’s really not that different from the sort of prop all of us use to get through hard times.
Now, the other big Sansa moment was at the end. Our San-San ship crashing into the hard rocks of reality shoals. Personally, I don’t know why the girl didn’t run when she had the chance. Being the Hound’s sex slave for a weeks-long hike to Winterfell (or life) is way better than being married to Joffrey. I think the problem was that Sansa thought Stannis was going to win. Cersei inspired the wrong conviction in her breast! So she was assuming that she would get sent back to Robb or at worst would still be a hostage but at least not one facing imminent marriage to a sociopath. Win-win. The Hound’s offer must have seemed like the pimply geek asking her to prom when she was dating the quarterback.
Unfortunately for Sansa, Stannis will not be liberating her any time soon.
I do wonder if Margaery Tyrell might be up for some liberating Sansa, though, since she is determined to be The Queen and Joffrey is really her only viable path at this point. I bet between Littlefinger and Tywin and Margaery they can find a way around marrying Joffrey to Sansa. I just hope it doesn’t involve killing the girl. She has grown on me enough that I don’t want to see the little bird die.
Rachel: Hmmmmm, astute of you. This may or may not be important when it becomes common knowledge that Robb has lost Winterfell to the Greyjoys. Sansa’s worth as a key to the North might come into question at that point, or she might be an excuse to invade the North on behalf of the South. Either way, I’m glad Sansa didn’t take the Hound up on his offer…. could you imagine what would happen to Sansa at her homecoming? Shudder.
Elena: Speaking of dying…. Wildfire! And sad onion knight Ser Davos.
Rachel: Davos is ALWAYS sad. Okay, so this time his son got blowed up and Stannis lost the war and Tywinning handed them their asses…but he’ll always have the night the lights went out in that cave with Melisandre? (Oh yeah…remember Reba? I’m having a moment here…). Oh wait, no, he doesn’t want to remember that ever again. (Me neither.) (But Tremors is amazing.)
Let’s talk about the fuuucking wildfire. THEY BLEW IT UP. THEY FINALLY DID IT! The Hound was all scared, soldiers were on fire, the Maester was giddy with joy. The only thing I missed was the great chain that Tyrion had them secretly build and string across the water to block the ships from escaping the port, so that he could really make sure they ALL burned. Obviously this point was a victim of more streamlining. That’s fine. I think most of Stannis’ ships burned. I guess. I might be on Team Wild Fire.
Let’s talk about those battle scenes:
They were definitely great. For television especially. Not as gruesome as your average episode of True Blood (waves at the dude who got his head all splatted), but I’m okay with that because the more gore, the less serious the situation becomes for the audience. There was certainly reliance on cut shots rather than epic panning because, duh. Shit is expensive. They gave us that one long shot when the boat blew. Beauteous as it was.
I was a little miffed that there were no horses. It makes everything seem a whole lot smaller than it should have felt? Like when Lancel is running back and forth between the battle and Cersei, it’s almost like he is just ducking through the portcullis and running into the throne room and …well, obviously, there’s an entire fucking CITY in between. The same goes for Tyrion skulking through the sewers to come around behind Stannis’ men (also…where did those backup troops of Stannis’ even COME from? Around the corner?!)
Then suddenly Tywinning barges in and we’re expected to instantly recognize Renly’s armor as distinct from Tywin’s (which even I did not immediately notice or comprehend until I saw Loras take the helmet off after, and then I was all…ohhhh Loras wearing Renly’s armor moment). (And yet Stannis didn’t have a helmet? I DON’T UNDERSTAND SOMETIMES.)
Zen.
Anyways what I mean is Loras is the only person in Westeros with a damn horse, and it just happens to be the same horse Tywin has been riding all season?
Get some horses HBO. JUST GET SOME.
Elena: Wait, wasn’t Tywin going for Robb? And how did the Tyrells get involved? Was that where Littlefinger went and what he did? OMG what scheme did he and Tywin concoct for him to offer to the Tyrells!? How sad is Stannis tonight? What will he do next?
Rachel: Ha haaa…you were fooled! Arya was fooled! Tywin went for King’s Landing instead of Robb. A totally different direction!
Now why would the Tyrells be involved? It’s quite simple. The Tyrells supported Renly. Renly was killed by (no one knows), but they suspect Stannis’ involvement. So they can’t turn around and support Stannis’ claim. But they CAN support the next Baratheon claimant, which would be Joffrey. Catelyn ran off with Brienne, herself a suspect in Renly’s death, so that pretty much killed the Tyrell’s allying with Robb in a Northern/Southern pincher attack. Of course, Margaery wouldn’t be interested in that anyways, since Robb is promised to a bridge and that doesn’t leave many avenues towards Queenhood, other than allying with another House to claim the Iron Throne, since Robb doesn’t want it. That just brings us back to the original Baratheon conflict, and the Tyrells are left with Joffrey again. Mostly because Loras wants himself some vengeance against Stannis for killing Renly. Mostly.
Littlefinger is obviously playing a huge role in this – don’t forget he exists! He has teleportation powers that he has lent to Tywin, in the land of Westeros where distances have no meaning in the narrative. (ZEN).
Anyways, it’s incredibly important because although the Lannisters are not without some serious army, the Tyrells are just as rich as the Lannisters, and they’ve got TONS of men in their army. This is definitely a great move for the Lannisters since Dorne has never loved them, and the Tyrells provide a perfect buffer and protection against the southernmost house that the TV viewers haven’t met yet.
And Robb…well, does Robb even have a bridge anymore? We know he doesn’t have a home. His mother is on the run. He’s lost his Lannister captive and gained a foreign girlfriend.
We all know that Sansa no longer harbors those fantastical fairytale feelings of love for Joffrey on the hit series “Game of Thrones.” Beginning when he had her father publicly beheaded last season, her ill feelings are hard to not see and feel (especially after all the cruel things he does to her this season.) Unfortunately Sansa has to deal with it being an incredibly valuable tool as a political marriage pawn as she in confined to King’s Landing awaiting her wedding day to the new mad king.
The actress who plays Sansa, Sophie Turner, recently sat down with TVGuide and answwered some questions about her character during season 2.
On last nights episode we saw the epic Battle of the Blackwater take place between Joffrey’s loyals and those loyal to Stannis, his uncle. During this, Sansa was left to deal with other challenges.
She’s at Maegor’s Holdfast while the battle is going on,” Turner says. “She’s strong, and I think she’s quite strong-willed, but she’s also incredibly frightened. I can tell you that you’ll see sides to Sansa that would seem very queen-like. She takes quite a leadership role.”
Some may wonder where Sansa gets all her strength to deal with the repeated mental and physical abuse in King’s Landing. Turner reveals just what keeps her going.
I think she gets strength from thinking how her mother and father would cope. She also thinks of her sister Arya because Arya is so strong, and she would usually fight back. We never really saw it last season, but we’re seeing it now.”
Knowing that Sansa hates Joffrey – now – her feelings toward his mother, Cersei, are less cold.
It’s quite a bizarre relationship because at first she kind of felt Cersei was a second mother until … she realizes that the Baratheons and the Lannisters aren’t all they seem to be. And now she really hates Cersei, but … she can’t help feeling that Cersei has been through this before, because she went through the exact same thing with King Robert. Although he wasn’t as bad with Cersei as Joffrey is with Sansa. But they’ve got something in common, and they’ve got some sort of connection.”
Turner also spoke about the actor behind Joffrey and what he is like on the set.
He’s one of the most lovely people I’ve ever met, and I can’t stress it enough to the fans of the show because I’m scared people are going to come up to him and say horrible things to him. They shouldn’t because he’s lovely.”
When watching the show, fans can see a definite connection between Sansa and The Hound. Turner spoke about their relationship and why they are close.
Well, I think it kind of mirrors Sansa and Cersei in the way that The Hound has been a victim of bullying by his older brother. And that kind of mirrors Sansa’s story line with Joffrey. And so he feels very protective of her, I think, and he doesn’t want anything like what happened to him to happen to Sansa, because she’s still very vulnerable in terms of physicality.”
Tyrion, despite being a Lannister, is much less cruel and overall mean. He had previously helped Sansa from the abusing hands of Joffrey. It is hard to see whether or not Sansa will trust him or not.
Tyrion does care for Sansa although Sansa knows she has to be very, very wary. Her main focus is to stay alive, to survive to see her family again, and I don’t think she’s willing to trust anyone at this point except for her maid Shae (Sibel Kekilli). Which is quite ironic, because she’s not actually who she says she is. She’s Tyrion’s whore.”
You can see the rest of the interview with TVGuide here.
